Hello Brown Truth Tubers,
It’s been a really long time since I’ve had the pleasure of dousing you with my thoughts and experiences about natural hair. I do however have a reason; though, I should have never left you.
It’s no shock that life got in the way: my career (took many unexpected turns and surprises, my heart had run an unexpected course, and my hair grew to unimaginable lengths). Overall, in the interim, I got to experience what true growth (both natural and spiritual) really is when you’re on a destined path, especially if you embrace it with deafening ears to those who are too insecure to welcome their own.
The biggest lesson I’ve learned, and this was an unexpected one, is that accepting you, your flaws, and your failures is the best thing you’ll ever be able to do for yourself. To explain, life is so unpromising that waiting for perfect moments, hair length goals, scale milestones and a future husband can deter you from your destined existence…those moments that have been patiently awaiting your epiphanies to just breathe, or rather, for you to just do it…ultimately reveals that you should live instead of exist. We all should.
Last year a lot happened. But, the one area of my life that I had success, was on my crown. I had-before I’d even realized it-a head full of hair that grew beyond my expectations…all because I simply enjoyed it. The experience of being natural seemingly brought the laid-back comfort that I would soon start to approach the world with through fiery fierce eyes and mountainous heavy steps. Every step I took in focusing on what I loved about myself, unexpectedly took me closer to everything I would learn to love about myself that I once never liked. Once I had realized that my acceptance of my real hair (which is in my eyes a big deal, it’s always been a big issue since the world for so long has tried to tell women of African descent that we aren’t beautiful in any way, shape or form) had become the end all be all…my world had shed a new lens. I quickly saw that my already #boom personality I’d cultured throughout my entire life thus far had become #ThatBoom.
I know this debate on loving your natural self constantly goes back and forth between the arguments of, “…it really doesn’t matter” or “…it’s just hair…” still doesn’t convince many, but when it comes to me, experience wins; though it may be subjective, this is all it takes. I fell more and more into an abyss of happiness the more I realized how real I felt, and I’m not referring to just the physical realm, but the internal manifestation of how my soul now projected what I consider true beauty, which can only be released from an awakened real you. And not the you the world sees, but the you your soul sees. This isn’t to say that I ever presented myself as a fake to the world, but for me, it’s just something about really muting the world of all its judgments and listening to your soul and projecting that being you were meant to be.
The feeling I experienced as I walked out into the world everyday was irreplaceable. At first, I couldn’t figure out if it was the peace and serenity in knowing that now, no matter what, both the image and level of cognition that my soul now projected outwardly had become an unidentifiable substance of the world, basically meaning that my uniqueness could never be duplicated now. Only I could decode it. Finally. I couldn’t be touched by any negative thought or any irrelevant second-guessing because at some point along the way, without even realizing it, I just didn’t care.
In my mind, I wasn’t even aware of the fact that I just didn’t care (meaning, I now loved me and everything I stood for on a level so high that nothing no one said to/about me or did to me mattered; I was now my own rock, not just figuratively, but also literally, well in a sense. Along the way, my interest in a health style expanded into all things “give it your all”. I had reached a point in my life where maximizing peace and acceptance of self had become my own growth currency.
I know you’re thinking, what in the world does this has to do with being natural? Everything. The truth is, well, at least for me, becoming a natural almost five long years ago, was the eye-opening domino effect that would bring me into myself, the woman I am today.
Natural. And. Thankful for the view.
-The Brown Truth
Hello Brown Truth Tubers!
I’ve been away for a while but it’s been an extremely busy school year and in about three more weeks, I’m all yours again…to be free to write my blog posts and to continue the dialog on our bomb natural hair!
-The Brown Truth
“…Here’s to Being 30 Months Post Relaxer and Getting the New Nickname ‘Cabbage Patch Queen’ Because She’s (The Fro) is Getting Sooooooo Big!”
Sometimes…you just have to stop. Breathe. And take a break from the world. Right?
Well, what about when it comes to your hair? Do you continuously keep going through the motions out of exhaustion or do you take a chance on taking a break, and waiting to see how it can do you some good?
Though I have previously written about this topic, protective natural hairstyling, it really works and allows for you to not become overwhelmed. This is the reason, well at least for many of us, that we went natural…to aim for a healthier regimen right?
For me there was a clicking that happened simultaneously, I wanted to no longer have to rely on relaxers to manage my hair and as a matter of fact I didn’t even know why I was doing it. For most of my life I had been getting relaxers and I couldn’t even relate to the idea of being natural, let along explain to someone what it was.
The first time I saw my hair curl upon being wet it was like an outer body experience, there I was washing my hair and as it became wetter, it also became curlier…all I could think was “Wow!”…”I absolutely love it!”
Now, exactly 30 months to the day I decided I would never relax my hair again, I feel so blessed and relieved to have discovered such a world…a world where I not only feel confident and secure in my decision and experiences, but a world where I want to share it with others…a world where I can finally define what MY beauty truly is…and tell others what it is supposed to be according to well, just me.
Protective styling is an escape, a break, a way to come up with even more ideas of originality…NOW since being natural, I can almost be rest assured that no one else would hardly be able to copy off me at least all of the time…it gives me a chance to just live my life without worry and still be fashionable.
I don’t stress a lot anymore about anything hair related, I keep it very simple still and just try to bask in the path of my newly lived experiences as the newly noted “Cabbage Patch Queen” according to my older middle sister. She says, the longer my hair grows the bigger it gets and told me that I no longer am given justice from my childhood nickname, and that it was time for a remix, hence, she gave me the new nickname, “Cabbage Patch Queen“…
As of now, being noted as both The Brown Truth and Cabbage Patch Queen, I want to share a reminder of how crucial it is to have fun. I think it’s so funny that my sister fought for me to accept this new nickname she decided to give me…and who am I not to be open-minded. It is a good thing being open-minded as you embark upon this natural hair journey, I used to not be so sure why it was called a journey…but I have surely come to embrace the experience. I guess whether you think of it as a journey or not, it is definitely a lifestyle change that I plan on continuing for the rest of my life.
I feel at peace now, that I am finally me without any inhibitions. I hope that you can experience such a feeling one day as well if you haven’t already done so. I’m sorry I’ve been gone, but I’m back now!
Here’s to finally reaching 30 months post relaxer…here’s what I been up to for the last three months…:
…and here’s to the next 30 months!
-The Brown Truth a.k.a. Cabbage Patch Queen
Hello Brown Truth Tubers!!!
It’s been a busy beginning of the second half of the year. I just wanted to take a moment from my very all over the place life right now to share my current look, updates and words of advice:
She’s fine and have recently reached 12+ inches all around!
I finally made 27 months post relaxer, which means I am exactly 27 months natural…I do not count from my big chop start date…as I feel that can be really misleading as many naturals transition long before that…their length beyond the chop isn’t always the true length of that time span…SO…I am exactly 27 months past the moment I started letting my hair grow out of my scalp unaltered/manipulated!!!
It couldn’t be better! I love being natural…the beauty of my hair and my confidence shines right through!
***********************************WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT*********************************
Hang in there…time will become your best friend…meanwhile…back in your current reality, enjoy the real moments your hair is giving you right NOW!
***Until Next Time***
–The Brown Truth
Doesn’t it just make your day when you’re wearing THAT natural and another fellow natural shares a complement or has a conversation with you without ever opening their mouth-just eye contact-and yall be like-YEAH-without ever even having to say it.
-The Brown Truth
—I Am Not Even Going To Try To Understand It Anymore—
I sometimes find myself quietly annoyed at naturals/nonnaturals who constantly stop me or directly ask me how I have gotten my hair to be so healthy, thick, and so lusciously long.
I tell them: “I haven’t put heat on my hair for over two years”…”I haven’t put chemicals in my hair for over two years”…”I haven’t put color into my hair CHEMICALLY-BASED or NATURALLY-BASED for over two years”…”I do not do any style where I have to touch, slick, pull, or handle my edges constantly”…”I use a spray bottle to spritz a concoction made with conditioner, oils, and water every morning and night over my hair”…”I cover my hair nightly or whenever I lay down with satin or silk”…”I wear my hair in protective styles as much as I wear it out”…”I deep condition often”…”I trim only when my hair tells me ‘she’ needs a trim”…
Shall I go on?
Then, unsurprisingly after a few days, weeks or months…they come back and say, “Well what are you doing to that beautiful hair…or an update: “Oh, I haven’t started that regimen yet” or “I really need to try it” or “You know what, it’s not going to matter because you’ve always had long hair and it’s all genetic”…
“MAN, POOF BE GONE!”
-The Brown Truth
***No Matter What IT Is…It Starts With Making The CHOICE***
I just discovered today that many of my debates come from the realization that some people have the need to clench to laziness.
I Despise Laziness…I Easily Become Irritated When Seeing It.
I don’t believe in excuses…sure there are always going to be obstacles and setbacks…in fact many…but if you’re not even trying…then don’t even attempt to suck up any of my oxygen complaining…I’m just going to look at you and say…well…that’s what usually lead to the many debates I have with people…
Don’t like it? This is all the more reason why they’re in a stasis…
If You Want Something…Put In The Time To Earn It Gradually
Just Some Examples:
1. Do your own hair to create the health in it you seek
2. Get off your butt & workout daily to lose lbs- even just 15 min.
3. If you need a slimmer bottom…work on the bottom
4. If you need to lose the top…WORK on it…and do CRUNCHES
5. Want a better job…avail yourself to the qualifications
5. Want to accomplish a goal…write the list and stick to it
6. Waiting on a dream to come true…have faith and create it
7. Want to live a long healthy life…BE healthy and don’t cheat it
8. Want to encourage others….be the prime example
9. Want to travel…start with a passport and work toward the rest
10. Want to be aware…more informed-Read…experience culture
“Your laziness is not a factor in my own efforts or success.”
-The Brown Truth